You don’t need friends to be happy
November 27, 2017
There are approximately 1,600 students at Taylorsville High School; more than likely you probably know around 500, be it personally or you just know of them. Odds are you have been in school with at least 30-40 of them since junior high or even elementary school. You’ve been with them for a while, and in that time you’ve developed a friendship or acquaintance and you can’t imagine not seeing them every day.
Now let’s be real here.
There are 7.5 billion people in the world, with the exception that approximately 353,000 babies are born every year. That means 255 babies born every minute. 4.3 every second. But who’s counting?
Anyway, the point is that the people you go to school with are 0.000000213 of the total population in the world. (If you aren’t a math whiz just know: that’s not a lot.)
Oftentimes there’s a sort of pressure whether it is put on by the environment around us or internally (in terms of comfort zones and what not) to stay with the same people. Some people even take it a step further and marry their high school sweetheart. So truly you begin kindergarten and finish with ‘til death do us part.
Newsflash: there are billions (aha this is where the math from above comes in) of other people in the world. There is a whole wide world out there and you’re just being ignorant if you stay in your comfort zone. It’s great to not be alone and have people you can rely on at school, but you’re capable of doing and finding so much more.
It was mentioned before but there’s this sort of expectation that has been ingrained in everyone’s mind that we shouldn’t talk to strangers and we shouldn’t branch out.
I’m here to tell you that yes, you can do and be so much more than what has been predetermined for you here in Taylorsville, Utah. I’m going to take it a step further and say that you may feel pressured to have someone in high school – be it a significant other or a best friend – and the truth is: most high schoolers need to learn how to be alone.
Codependence is a high school epidemic and it’s infuriating as well as toxic. You do not need another human in order to function. I’m going to say it louder for the couples on top of each other in the commons, YOU DO NOT NEED ANOTHER HUMAN IN ORDER TO FUNCTION.
Believing that you do puts an unhealthy strain on your relationship. You rely too much on that person and when they are gone, be it on a trip or out of your life entirely, it’s like the Mount Vesuvius of emotions has come out of hibernating, just to ruin your entire life.
It needs to be taught and learned that there is a huge difference between being alone and feeling lonely.
It is perfectly okay to see a movie by yourself, run errands, and even get dinner all by yourself. It is heightened in high school, seeing as you’ve been with most of the people around you for most of your life, it feels as though you can never be without them. The truth of the matter is: after high school you will be more or less alone.
The sooner a person can embrace who they are and find it within themselves to be alone, they will experience life like none other.
The days of wasting your brain space with people who are just floating in your life to occupy time will be gone. You’ll be free to love yourself and not seek the validation in others.
It’s okay to be alone.